The Final Countdown

School starts in 2 days and it's going to be a rough semester. I'm looking forward to it because I think my classes will be interesting but I'm not excited about the work and stress that accompanies the semester. But, I'm relieved that it's my last semester of classes. Things are going to be great.

Art I Want to Learn More About

1. Synchromism
2. Edward Hopper
3. Whistler
4. Male Surrealists
5. Duchamp
6. Man Ray
7. Second Generation Feminists
8. Leonor Fini

Jasper Johns

I love Jasper Johns. This painting is one of my first avenues into art history when I painted a partial replica of it for Godshall's class as part of our exploration of the 1950s. Johns work is one of those that absolutely has to be seen in person because it really comes to life when you are in front of the paintings. I haven't seen this one but I have seen other works of his and I think the most compelling aspect of his work is the textures that he achieves through his use of collage and encaustic. It is through these techniques that he turns mundane objects like numbers and makes them interesting and captivating. A true pop art genius.

On another note, I start school next week and writing this makes me think I might be ready to go back.

Uh Oh...

So, I just almost did something that I shouldn't have. I did it a little. Anyway, I don't want to give too many details but I have this overwhelming sense of guilt. And also, a sense that I should have been more skeptical about his fidelity. I guess that's all I should say. Sorry this is so cryptic.

Update-- Yeah, I told him what I did, which was read a letter I found for him. Although I only read the first page. Curiosity killed the cat...

Grrrr!

Why do I pick fights when things are going well? What the fuck is wrong with me?

Girly Problems

Been PMS for the past few days. I absolutely hate feeling this way. It makes things miserable for everyone...

I also had a talk with him about our relationship and basically got no where. Things are complicated and everything is dependent upon something else that he has no control over. But, unfortunately, it still sounds like good-bye is forthcoming.

On the Road Again...

So, Thursday I'm leaving to go back to Amherst. On the train for another seven hours. That part stinks but I'm so looking forward to seeing him again. We've only spent a week apart but I do miss him. This kind of thing always makes me worry that I'm becoming too dependent on this relationship. I just always want to be my own woman and independent person and certainly not dependent on a man for my happiness.

But he makes me happy. Which makes me especially worried because I still believe that it can go away at any moment. I know that he loves me and that he wants to be with me, but it can still go away, especially since he's probably going to be moving away some time in the future. Long distance relationships don't work and eventually both of us will want to move on if we can't be together, no matter how much we care about each other. But the good news is that he does want to be with me. He wants me to come and visit him again within the same month and he is coming here after that for some unknown amount of time. I just think things are going so well for us right now and we are becoming really close and really strong and I'm not ready to let go. But I don't know how to fight for him...

Mark Rothko, Red, Green, Violet (1951)

Rothko's work is extremely engaging. I have a soft spot for abstract expressionism. For Rothko it was all about creating an environment through his large scale works. In person, the fields of color appear to hover on the canvas. This work is particularly a favorite because of the interesting combination of colors that he uses here.

Misinterpretations

So, I think I have completely misread the situation. I thought John wanted to move in with me for a few months so that we could spend time together and be a couple. Now I'm beginning to see that in fact he only wants to visit for a couple weeks so that he can say goodbye. I can't tell you how disappointed I am.

Georgia O'Keeffe, Music- Pink and Blue II

I love this O'Keeffe. I don't have much to say about it because I think there's been way too much hype around Georgia O'Keeffe but I wanted to post it nonetheless. I love the colors and movement of this one...