Gloomy

I'm missing John terribly. I knew it would be hard to go from having him here with me to being across the country from him but I didn't think that I would think about it as often as I do. Saying goodbye to him on the phone brings me to tears. I'm just feeling pathetic and horribly codependent. And after all of that I'm just so sad that he left. I wish that he had tried harder to find work in Syracuse. I don't understand why he didn't want to stay here with me.